I don't

Dear George,

You've said some fascinating things lately, let's look at some!

"Marriage is the most fundamental institution of civilization."

Oh? That sounds really nice! I think I'd like that! What? No? I can't have it? The most enduring and important human institution is completely closed to me if I happen to love a man? Honestly, just take a second, and listen to the way that sounds, man! You want to tell your buddy Dick Cheney's lesbian daughter that she can't have a part in the biggest spiritual and cultural institution? If it's that big a thing, then why is it illegitimate for me to want it? And how is it not cruel to deny it?

"The Massachusetts court, for example, has called marriage 'an evolving paradigm.' That sends a message to the next generation that marriage has no enduring meaning, and that ages of moral teaching and human experience have nothing to teach us about this institution."

Oh! You know, we've heard that argument before, but it used to be applied to a fun tradition called slavery. Do you really suppose that just because we've (and I use "we" rather loosely) done something one way for a considerable length of time that makes it good?

Look, I know you were too busy bumping lines off a hooker's chest and driving drunk to pay attention during your Con Law class to actually crack a book, but can you tell me exactly when "evolving paradigm" became a buzzterm of evil liberal elite? Because I kind of thought that the constitution of the US - you know, that yellow paper that magically makes our country great - was something of an "evolving paradigm" itself.

Also, this tradition you speak of: it has been a long tradition in our country to grant rights with amendments, rather than take them away.

What are you going to do about the issue of trangender marriage? Does the Almighty look the other way if you wanted it bad enough to go under the knife? I honestly don't mean to confuse you by linking transgender motivations and homosexuality, but if you're going after one already, what's the deal? Are they next?

"The union of a man and woman in marriage is the most enduring and important human institution. For ages, in every culture, human beings have understood that marriage is critical to the well-being of families. And because families pass along values and shape character, marriage is also critical to the health of society. Our policies should aim to strengthen families, not undermine them. And changing the definition of marriage would undermine the family structure."

So, are you going to do something about divorce? What happened to all that "til death do us part"? It was a long tradition that marriage was for life. Ah, but Henry VIII was definitely your kind of man! (Sorry, I'm talking over your head again! Henry VIII invented divorce.) But seriously, I can't remember the last person I met who had parents that were still married, and I've seen that have a pretty negative effect on some of my friends. I hope you'll be protecting them!

Georgie, I know I'm not saying anything you haven't heard before (except maybe that stuff about the constitution and Henry VIII, have an aide look those up on the "internets"), and I know that you really have no intention of seeing any of this through. It can't hope to pass. But before you go to sleep tonight, after Condi tucks you and Commander-and-Teddy into bed and you are sending your prayers up to the baby Jesus, I want you to think: "Are these policies I'm forming similar in any way to the worldview of those who hate freedom, the radical Islamists?"

your pal,

Ryan